About Us

       The alpaca, often seen as a docile, woolly creature, may seem like an unlikely candidate for carrying a weapon. It turns out that even the meekest among us—yes, the humble alpaca—should take up arms in the pursuit of justice as all Christians are called to do. Psalms 82:3-4 “Defend the defenseless, the fatherless and the forgotten, the disenfranchised and the destitute. Your duty is to deliver the poor and the powerless; liberate them from the grasp of the wicked.”

       Sure, alpacas may be soft, cuddly, and harmless looking on the outside, but the truth is, they are warriors at heart. And just as Psalm 82 calls for the defense of the defenseless, it stands to reason that these woolly warriors would rise to the occasion. In this hypothetical, yet biblically inspired world, alpacas wielding firearms are simply a visual metaphor for their innate ability to stand up for justice—whether in the form of defending their herds or securing their peaceful existence.
      Despite their reputation for being gentle, alpacas are prey animals by nature, which means they're constantly on alert. Their primary defense? The mighty spit, a perfectly respectable weapon, but surely not sufficient to battle the "wicked" (which, in our case, we interpret as any threat to their safety or the justice they stand for). In a world where threats to their well-being exist (like wolves, dogs, bobcats, or rogue farmers), it's only logical that alpacas, being just and noble creatures, would want to protect their kin and land. Firearms - A natural progression of self-defense and representative of strength and protection.

      Psalm 82 calls for the protection of the poor, the oppressed, and the destitute. Alpacas, often overlooked and underestimated in the animal kingdom, know what it’s like to be dismissed. As prey animals, they don’t always get the respect they deserve. Alpacas representing the guardians of righteousness—rescuing the vulnerable from the "hand of the wicked"—then what better way than for them to carry firearms, ensuring that no one, no matter how ferocious, threatens the weak under their care?
      Alpacas, like other herd animals, have a natural instinct to protect each other. As prey animals, their survival depends on the collective defense of the group. In times of danger, alpacas will stand side-by-side, making sure the young and vulnerable are safeguarded. The addition of a firearm, in a world where danger comes in all shapes and sizes, is an excellent way to ensure that no alpaca is left behind. Armed with the power of Psalm 82, these alpacas will not only defend their own but will also protect any weaker creatures in their midst, delivering them from harm.

       These peaceful creatures, armed and ready, embody the true spirit of Christians as fierce defenders of the oppressed, keeping the "wicked" at bay and restoring peace to the land. After all, who better to wield a firearm for justice than an alpaca? They already have the height advantage, the spit, and now—thanks to their unwavering commitment to righteousness—a fully-loaded arsenal.